Sunday, February 28, 2010

MEN!

MEN!!!! One day my housework-challenged husband Decided to wash his Sweatshirt Seconds after he stepped Into the laundry room, He shouted to me, 'What setting do I use on theWashing machine?' 'It depends,' I replied. 'What does it say on your shirt?' He yelled back, ' GO GATORS! ' And they sayBlondes are dumb.... ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- ------- A couple is lyingIn bed. The man says, 'I am going to makeYou the happiest woman in the world...' The woman replies,'I'll miss you....... ------------ --------- ------- 'It's just too hot to wear clothes today,'Jack says as he stepped out of the shower. 'Honey, what do you think theNeighbors would think if I mowed the lawn like this?' 'Probably that I married you for your money,' she replied. ------------ --------- --------- --------- ---- Q: What do you call An intelligent, good looking, sensitive man? A: A rumor ------------ --------- --------- --------- ---- Dear Lord, I pray for Wisdom to understand my man; Love to forgive him; And Patience for his moods.. Because, Lord, if I pray for Strength, I'll beat him to death. AMEN ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- ------- Q: Why do little boys whine? A: They are practicing to beMen. ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- -- Q: What do youCall a handcuffed man? A: Trustworthy. . ------------ --------- --------- --------- ------ Q: What does itMean when a man is in your bed gasping For breath and calling your name? A: You did not hold the pillow down long enough. ------------ --------- --------- --------- --- Q: Why do men whistle when they Are sitting on the toilet? A: It helps them remember which end to wipe.. ------------ --------- --------- --------- ---- Q: How do youKeep your husband from reading your e-mail? A: Rename theEmail folder 'Instruction Manuals' ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- - Send this to at least five bright, Funny women you know and make their day! And send this to five Bright men who have enough sense of humor to take it! From one of my funny friends who pushed me out of the sense of humor line in Heaven! Why are my friends SO funny? I swear I missed that Line!

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